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Isolated Trump Smoke Signals Followers: "Storp the Capital"

Reduced to using smoke signals to communicate with the outside world, President Trump caused some confusion amongst his followers this morning with a message to "storp the capital".

Increasingly isolated since he incited a mob to storm the Capitol Building Wednesday, Trump's latest communication came at the end of a series that read: "Election ragged" and "What's up with Weeknd's face?"

"Seriously, what's up with Weeknd's face?" Trump flapped from the White House's south lawn five minutes later, but it was his reference to what was assumed to be the capitol that created the most buzz.

"It was a ragged election, but what does storp mean?" one commenter on Parler wondered, echoing the sentiments of hundreds more.

"I tried looking it up, but there's no 'storp' in the dictionary. Do you think he's invented a new language?"

"What do we do?" another puzzled. "Who do we storp?"

As of press time no clarification has been rendered by the President, whose most recent smoke signal was something about Kristin Wiig we're probably better off not having being able to decipher.

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