June 21, 2007 [home] [contact] [links] [disclaimer]
Christian Woman Diagnosed with Cancer Assumes God Made Mistake - Seeks Treatment
God goofed. Or so says Judy Miller, 44, of Columbia, Missouri.
After struggling for three weeks trying to reconcile her recent breast cancer diagnosis with her devout Christian faith, Miller concluded that God must have made a mistake by giving her such a serious illness at her young age, and has opted to turn to modern medicine to rectify the error.
"Through much introspection, thought and prayer, I'm positive that God must have slipped up when He gave me cancer, so I've decided to accept my doctor's recommended treatment of a combination of radiation and chemotherapy to eradicate the tumors He accidentally planted throughout my body," said Miller.
Miller, who has donated thousands of dollars to the local church she has attended regularly since she was a child, has a theory to explain how the mix-up occurred.
"God is all-knowing and-seeing, but it doesn't necessarily mean He's infallible," rationalizes Miller, "The truth is, He's a very busy guy, and my name isn't exactly all that uncommon. He probably meant to give the cancer to a Judy Miller who drinks alcohol and listens to rock and roll."
Although her doctor only gives her a fifty percent chance to survive God's gaffe, Miller claims she doesn't hold any grudges.
"Honestly, this experience has actually brought me closer to God," she says, "I believe that if you can accept and forgive the imperfections of those you love, your relationship can only grow stronger."
Miller then added, wagging her finger: "But I'm telling you, if I should die, me and Him are going to have a long, frank chat when I get to heaven."
If she does survive, Miller says she is looking forward to taking a trip to Disneyland with her husband and two teenage children.
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