Peyton Manning Expects to Make Full Return to Commercials in 2012

Peyton Manning said Friday he expects to make a full return to commercials in 2012.

The well-known pitchman for Mastercard, Sprint, DirecTV, Gatorade, Sony, NFLshop.com, NFL Sunday Ticket, ESPN, Oreo cookies, Nerf, Reebok and Wheaties has not appeared in any television ads this year due to nerve damage stemming from a herniated disc.

Media analyst David Garry elaborated on the road to recovery facing Manning.

"Peyton's fame actually originated from his football prowess, and his return to the small screen pitching products remains contingent upon his successful return to the gridiron," Garry said, "Basically, marketing studies have found that people don't want to buy things endorsed by someone riding the pine with a busted neck."

Mastercard, which has lost market share to its opponents within the credit card industry every week since having to shelve Manning for the likes of Snooki and Ray Romano, has already renewed their option on Manning's endorsement contract for 2012.

"There's just something magical about Peyton that can compel someone to switch from Visa to Mastercard that no loud, drunken nymphomaniac or cancer awareness campaign could ever recreate," Mastercard Spokeman Susan McRoberts remarked.

"I miss doing the ads, I really do," Manning said yesterday, "If I get cleared to play and I'm good enough, would I start shooting commercials again? Right away. Every day I have to spend on the sideline while Sprint's stock continues its downward spiral is no picnic. I'll be back just as soon as I can because that's my job. It's what I was born to do."