Vermont Voters Split Over Gay Marriage-Minimum Wage Ban

A proposition to amend the state constitution banning gay marriage and minimum wage protections in Vermont is polling at 51-49% ahead of the upcoming November elections.

The latest gauge of voter sentiment on the controversial measure, which will also abolish a variety of other labor laws in the Green Mountain State, includes a 4% margin of error, qualifying it as a statistical split.

Most ambivalent regarding Proposition 44 are working class conservatives, according to secondary polling.

"On one hand, getting rid of the state minimum wage could cut a big chunk out of my salary," remarked Paul Markley, of Newport, Vermont, "However, God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve, so there's that to think about."

Although spokespeople for Locker Jocks Apparel and Vermont state officials who authored the proposition acknowledge that dropping Vermont's minimum wage of $7.90 an hour to the current federal rate of $5.85 seems unseemly on the surface, the reduction, concomitant with the abolition of oppressive safety regulations and laws that force employers to discriminate against potential hirees based upon their age, will open the door for the construction of several new "sweatshop" factories throughout the state - so called because they will primarily manufacture tennis shoes and other sports related apparel.

"Vermont needs the economic boost that these new jobs will bring, making this proposition the perfect marriage - as opposed to ones that involve homosexuals, which are not only not perfect, but wrong," commented Vermont Secretary of Commerce Michael Torns.

Meanwhile, additional polling results indicate that an overwhelming majority of liberal voters opposed Proposition 44 regardless of their socioeconomic background while more affluent conservatives are standing behind it in nearly equal numbers.

"Personally, I don't support a minimum wage at all, because I don't believe it's the government's place to be telling people how to run their businesses or live their lives," said Morgan Anderson of Burlington, "Except when it comes to gay marriage and a number of other things I don't like."