|Home||World||National||Opinion||Local||Entertainment||Home And Garden||Advice||Farts And Giggles|
Mayans Full of Shit
The world failed to come to an end today, proving that the Mayans were full of shit.
The Mesoamerican civilization that occupied the Yucatan Peninsula from 1800 BC to 1100 AD had been considered highly advanced by scholars until a calendar system they developed that predicted the end of the world on December 21, 2012 demonstrated that they were in fact highly stupid.
"Here's a group of people who exhausted their agricultural potential with slash and burn farming techniques, wrote on tree bark, and, evidently, were too fucking stupid to accurately predict the end of the world," griped one man.
Added the man: "Now I have no job, no savings and am wondering what kind of idiot am I to take the word of an eons-dead race of people whose prophetic powers are apparently no better than a common evangelical Christian?"
Although relief was felt by many as this year's winter solstice waned with no signs of apocalypse, many others expressed disappointment over the still-spinning Earth.
"Really? Does it never end?" pondered one disillusioned man, "Great. More traffic jams and weekends with the family. Stupid fucking planet can kiss my ass."
The discredited Mayans will now join the Egyptians, Incas, Babylonians, Ottomans, Romans, Carthaginians, Greeks, Druids, Byzantines, Neanderthals, Aztecs, Persians, Pirates, Hobbits, Wizards, Elves, and every other form or race of man that has ever existed as being full of shit.
|Gay Soldier Makes Tiaras from Human Teeth|
|Congressman Wins Election By Just $6|
|Man Protesting Death of Man Beaten to Death by Police Beaten to Death by Police|