War Games Proving Increasingly Deadly for Nation’s Children

Two more young children perished today in yet another incident of War on Terror inspired playtime activity turned deadly.  The victims, whose names have yet to be released pending notification of their scarce parents, were shot to death in a Columbus, Ohio area park after the motorized Hummer car they were riding caused them to be mistaken for enemy combatants in a game of war taken too far by another pair of children dressed in Arab style clothing armed with weapons acquired from their homes.

The two triggermen, who answer only to the names Abdul and Mohammed despite being identified as local youngsters Daniel Fortson, 7 years old, and Brandon Hassel, 8, have demonstrated that they are still missing the point entirely by painting a different picture of the fatal encounter, asserting that their victims were contractors supplying cookie and juice provisions to their enemies, making them legitimate battlefield targets.

The deaths of the two children comes on the heels of the beheading of a nine year old boy by a friend in a Galveston, Texas garage on Saturday and a botched suicide bombing of a Let’s Play indoor playground in Knoxville, Tennessee by a five year old strapped with a belt of leftover Fourth of July fireworks last week and brings the total body count of kids killed in war play to 24 since Christmas and 78 since March 2003.

As for the reasons behind the emerging bloody crisis, many experts believe that a triumvirate of factors – the prevailing contemporary culture of glorified war within the context of the ongoing War on Terror, more realistic toys being marketed by manufacturers to capitalize on this trend, and easy access to real weapons by children – are to blame.

“I feel this emerging bloody crisis is the product of the glorification of war by the culture surrounding the War on Terror and the production of more realistic toys by manufacturers intent on capitalizing on this trend,” Remarked child psychiatrist Amanda Gunderson, who then added: “Those two things coupled with the easy access children have to real guns these days, that is.”

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