Slobodon Milosevic’s Head Converted into Filthiest Urinal in Bosnia - Line Stretches for Miles

After spending sixty-four years perched atop the shoulders of his flabby body, Slobodon Milosevic's head has a new job: as a receptacle of human waste in Bosnia’s newest – and filthiest – urinal stall.

Four days after dropping dead in the Hague where he was awaiting trial for crimes against humanity, the head of the deposed Serbian leader was removed, affixed to a urinal, and installed in the restroom of a Sarajevo train station in accordance with the wishes of millions of survivors of his genocidal reign.

“Normally I would never defecate in a urinal, but this time I made an exception,” exalted Reza Secerovic of Banja Luka, “I ate a big meal last night, built some stilts and shit right on his head."

Reports from the train station indicate that thousands of citizens from the republics of the fractured former Yugoslavia have made the pilgrimage to defile the face of the despised despot before it is thrown into the hole with the rest of his body Saturday, pushing the wait for the restroom to as long as twenty hours, causing officials concern for the welfare of some of those waiting.

"We are urging the people, especially the elderly and infirm, to not put their health in jeopardy by withholding their biological functions and to use the auxilliary facilities provided," said a Bosnian public health official.

Nevertheless, despite the cramping and occasional outburst of grief from someone having to yield to their natural rhythms, the atmosphere at the station is highly festive as musicians entertain the people with traditional folk songs and dozens of vendors make money hand over fist selling hamburgers, beef kebabs, sausages, mince meat pies, asparagus, sour cabbage, pizza, prunes, ice cream, baklava, lemonade and beer. In addition, the media has arrived to cover the event, capturing such distinctive images of Bosnian and Croatian women holding pictures of Milosevic's befouled head, mocking the grief of their ignorant Serbian counterparts.

Spoke an elderly woman from Travnik: "Milosevic's goons burned my village and killed my son, so today it felt good to club him on the head with my purse, even though it means that I must buy a new one since now it is covered with piss and shit."